| |
| |
|
Parenting Information |
|
|
|
Scolding: One of Communications Tools of Last Resort
(Excerpted from Jim Rohn's 2004 Weekend Leadership Event) You have to be very careful of scolding. Scolding, as a last resort, may be necessary but you must be very careful. Scolding someone is like giving them a cut, giving them a small cut with your words on the hand. Maybe it will serve its purpose, and the cut will heal and everything will be okay. You needed to get their attention. But you must not do it everyday, all the time. Some children end up with psychological scars because they have been cut (scolded) everyday. Scold, scold everyday and they wind up psychologically disadvantaged because of that kind of treatment. Because somebody has the words, but words that are cruel; and they use them too often, all the time rather than saving them up as a tool of last resort. They just cut and scold all the time, and kids sometimes have a hard time working out of this because of that kind of environment. "Too severe, it's too severe", we say. In some countries if you steal, they cut off your hand. In our country we'd say, "That's a bit too severe isn't it?" But guess what they say, "It is very effective." Ask someone who has stolen, "Did you ever steal anything else?" And most assuredly they will answer, "Are you kidding with just one hand - No!" So it is effective, but we say too severe. So parents, let me talk to you about cruel and unusual scolding. You must be gifted in thinking of ways to effectively communicate with your children. Now sometime severity is needed as a last, last resort. John Kennedy's father, "Old Joe", said this to John, and you will see when I give it to you that it will serve you in so many ways. Now here is what "Old Joe" said: "If it is not necessary to change, it is necessary not the change." I am sure you got that message now. If it is not absolutely necessary to scold, then it is necessary not to scold. If it is not necessary to use sarcasm, then it is necessary in your communication not to use sarcasm. If it is not necessary to get angry, then it is necessary not to get angry; you get the idea. If a parent screams all day at her children, the kids finally get used to it. They learn to say, "Momma, she just screams all day." Kids come over to visit and the kids say, "Don't mind Momma, she's just a screamer, she just screams all day." So the kids are just used to it. But now here is the big problem... when the 3-year old child heads for the street and a truck is coming and Momma screams; and nobody pays any attention. See Momma should save up her screams, so the day it becomes a necessary tool of last resort, and she does scream, the world stops! See that's the key. These are called, "Tools of Last Resort", use them well! To Your Success, Jim Rohn Reproduced with permission from Jim Rohn's Weekly E-zine.Copyright 2005 Jim Rohn International. All rights reservedworldwide. To subscribe to Jim Rohn's Weekly E-zine, go tohttp://Jim-Rohn.InspiresYOU.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Parenting - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Road Trip with Kids Boredom, limited space and overflowing energy are a source of nuisance for a child when in a restaurant - how much more in the narrow cage of a car on a hour-long ride. You have barely left your home when the notorious "Are-we-there-already" starts, sometimes replaced by the equally infamous "How-long-is-it-still-going-to-take" and "I-have-to-pee" (the latter preferrably on highways with no possibility to stop). Legacy to Your Children John Bishop's Goal Setting for Students.comLegacy to Your ChildrenIt's 6:30 at night and you just got home from a long day at work, but the day's not over yet. Grandparents! Help Your Grandkids Do Math! This may come as a surprise.But despite all the advances in education, many kids stillstruggle in the math class. Promote Physical Fitness for Your Child If your child is to derive the benefits of physical fitness, then physical activity must be habitual and lifelong. Moving should be as routine as brushing teeth and bathing. Send Your Child to College FREE! College is one of the largest expenses through the course of your childā??s life. It is also one of the main causes of debt in America. Stop, Look, Listen! Steps to Better Parenting Communication As a parent is seems that the majority of your day is spent trying to get your children to listen to what you are trying to teach them. Make them understand how to me a responsible child. Why Do People Have Kids? Despite the theory that people have kids because they want and have planned for a family; the truth is that most people have kids because a woman gets pregnant. That is about the only reason. STOP Parental Alienation Syndrome before It Gets a Chance to START Parental Alienation Syndrome was probably first identified and codified by Dr. Richard Gardner in his book of the same name. Top Three Reasons To Get Involved At Your Childs School You may think once your child has gone off to school full-time (officially a First-Grader) that he/she no longer needs you.. The Secrets To Improving Childrens Behaviour Most parents at some stage are driven to distraction by one or more of their children's annoying habits or behaviours, whether it is a toddler who continually whines, a school-aged child who leaves clothes lying around or a teenager who uses a less than pleasant vocabulary.How to affect change is a challenge for many parents. Why Modern Moms Are Going Back to the Basics - The Evolution of the Cloth Diaper Having a baby is one of the most exciting times of your life. It is also one of the most stressful. Parenting Your Teenager: How to Respond to Manipulation Q. My daughter has gotten very good at manipulating us, and sometimes we do not even know it has happened until much later. The Child Chef If you really want to get your children to eat better, and have a better understanding of healthy foods, let them help in the picking and cooking of those foods. When you go shopping, let your children pick out a fruit or vegetable to cook that week. Uniforms Direct Answers - Column for the week of May 31, 2004I am concerned about my daughter, "Julie." She is 16 and a junior in high school. Is Your Behavioural Change Strategy Working? 'How can I start getting my children to help out at home?'Many parent ask me this question. My answer is simple - "It depends!"Achieving a behavioural change in children is dependent on their age and stage of development, their temperament and attitude, and how set in their ways they are. Where Will YOUR Kids Get A Job? Let's face it.The job market is getting tougher every day. Is Your Discipline Damaging the Spirit of the Child? If your parenting methods include abuse of any kind; physical, sexual, emotional or verbal, please get help to stop as soon as possible. Adults are supposed to safeguard and protect the young among us. Parenting Your Teenager: The Teenager and the Gorilla Q: A parent writes in to ask, "You write a lot about the difference between controlling and managing teenagers. What's the difference. Raising a Tobacco-Free Kid We begin forming healthy habits at a young age. With all that we know about smoking, it is astounding that young people will still take that first puff of a cigarette just to see what it is like. How To Be Your Childs Sex Educator The debate in many towns continues throughout this country about who should hold the responsibility of educating young people about sex and sexuality. On one side of the spectrum there are those who believe that parents and only parents should be teaching such sensitive and value-fill information to kids.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
