| |
| |
|
Parenting Information |
|
|
|
Back to School Success: The Parents Job and the Students Job
Q. With another school year starting, we are not sure how to handle things with our teen-ager. Last year turned into such a battle, and we fear another year just like last year. Is there anything we can do to help make this a successful year? A. The short answer is yes, there are many things you can do to make this a better school year, not just for your teen, but for the whole family as well. The long answer is that I think you have asked a very interesting and important question. Many of the families I work with struggle a great deal over the issue of school. In my experience, this power struggle seems to be caused by a fundamental difference between parents and kids in their perception of the purpose of school. Here's how I believe it works: For parents, the perception is, ``We work all day; the kids don't. School is their job. Therefore, they should get good grades, just as we want to do well at our jobs.' The teen-agers' perception is quite different, however. In their view, school is rarely more than their social world, interrupted by six or seven classes a day. As in most power struggles, each point of view has at least some validity. School really is the job of teen-agers, and they need to be in charge of themselves in this area. At the same time, school really is their social world. It's where they see most of their friends, and it's where they do a great deal of their interacting with peers. Having said all that, let's take a look at just what are the jobs of parents and teen-agers. The Parent's Job 1) To create an environment at home that encourages a love of learning. How often do your children see you reading? Hear you talking about something you have learned? Do you discuss ideas and issues with them? While these are things to start with your child on day one, you can still implement them in your home now. 2) This one is so simple yet so profound. Ask them their opinions on important issues of the day. You may be surprised to find out what kind of brains they have in there. 3) Make sure there is nothing blocking your teen-ager from learning. Examples of blocks are learning and information-processing disorders, and attention-deficit disorder. Many teen-agers I work with who have difficulty at school have undiagnosed ADD. Another block to learning can be the use of alcohol or drugs. Part of the process of drug abuse is that kids begin to lose interest in things that were once very important to them. If they are drunk or high at school, not only do they not want to learn, they can't. 4) Know the names and philosophies of the following people who influence your child's life: the principal, assistant principals, the guidance counselor and, most especially, the teachers. 5) Once you have done all this, simply put the teen-agers in charge of school. What I mean is, make them responsible for their performance at school. Doing so may be difficult; this may be one of those situations in which things get worse before they get better. THE Student's Job 1) To be in charge of themselves about school. They are the ones who get the grades. Parents don't get the grades, they do. One of the things I work on with teen-agers is to help them them understand that if they really want their parents off their backs, they will handle school well. When they don't, it's an open invitation to the parents to step in and take over. 2) Show up. That means going to school and then going to class. And one of the worst things about skipping is that it is incredibly addictive. 3) Find something in school to ``burn for.' Once you are really interested in something, learning becomes a lot more fun. Wanting your children to excel in school is natural and a good thing. But there comes a time when the ball is simply in their court, and it's up to them. I think the most important thing for parents to remember is that school needs to be more important to them than it is to you. Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
MORE RESOURCES:
Parenting - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Youth In A Changing World IntroductionChildren are the gifts of God to parents. That young child will in no time at all grow up to become a resposible future leader if he is well catered for. Children and Mom and Paper Memorabilia - Children can create enough artwork for an entire gallery in a few short weeks. The key here is choices; establish a particular place-e. Give Your Child Life Skills for a Lifetime Many parents struggle with solutions to put their child on the fast track to success, and one such solution is not usually far from home. It is your local martial arts school. Bath Time Fun Bath time can be fun or it can be a real hassle if your child is afraid or don't like it. So we as mothers try to make it a fun time for our little ones! Then the problem will be getting them out!Color ItBubble bath can be irritating to little ones causing urinary track infections, yeast infections as well as skin irritation. Teaching Your Children with Coupons Coupons can be a great tool in educating your child about saving money, being frugal, and shopping smart. Who doesn't want their children to grow up knowing how to save easily on every purchase? With coupon clipping you'll show them money saving skills they can use throughout their life!Teaching your child with coupons can start at an early age. Raising Boys The last decade has seen heightened interest in and awareness of the issues surrounding boys in most of the western world. It is common knowledge that boys lead the way in all the wrong statistics, including; problematic behaviours, learning difficulties and health problems. Tools to Find Family-Friendly Content The Internet, is magnificent in its resources for families. Educational resources abound. Unique Baby Names What's in a name? Er?well, everything, really! Of course your little bundle of joy is the sweetest, most beautiful thing you have ever seen and you want to choose a name that reflects his/her individuality, spirituality, uniqueness and all-round special-ness.But wait a minute!Remember that the unique baby name you choose will help define junior's life - how they are viewed and accepted - for many, many years. Ultimate Airplane Themed Games & Activities for your Childs Birthday Party Are you looking for the Ultimate Airplane Themed Party Games and Activities? Well stop looking because they are right here.. A New Dad To Be? Deer in the headlights? Ok. So you're a dad to be. The Hardest Job I Ever Had I used to have a really challenging job. It was stressful and demanding, high pressure and large responsibilities. Finding Answers to Underachievement Finding answers to a child's underachievement is often a difficult and complex process. Let intuition be your guide, knowing when and how to ask the right questions. Back to School Success Tips Q. With the school year just beginning, what can we do as parents to help make this a successful year for our teen-ager and our family?A. 14 Romantic Time-Outs for Parents Here are fourteen spontaneous time-outs, specially designed to help you pay the small attentions that are so integral to lasting intimacy.Day One: Spend 15 minutes kissing. Let's Google and Yahoo Our Kids' Education I love Google and Yahoo. With Google and Yahoo I can search the Internet on any subject that interests me, at any time day or night, in the comfort of my home. Parenting Your Teenager: 6 Things to Stop Doing Right Away 1. STOP focusing on what you are going to make your teen-ager doIt doesn't work. Picky Eater Syndrome 'Picky Eater' is a label coined to describe the phenomenon that someone has discerning taste preferences different from their parents or others. These discerning taste preferences are dictated by their blood and body type. 10 Points on Children for the New Parent I remember when my daughter was born, later my son. According to many well meaning individuals, I should've done this, should've done that and maybe improved in some areas. Secret Of Your Genuis Child Here is a top secret to make your child genius or ot recognise his geniusness, it is as followsGraphology for Child development.:- Graphology is the science of understanding the human mind through person's handwriting. The Truth About Motherhood What is the mystery of motherhood? I know that when I was pregnant, experienced mothers could not stop giving me advice on taking care of newborns, delivery expectations and child care solutions. Yet, no mother ever told me how dreadful post partum depression could be, how much my world would change, how one person can bring so much to my life.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
